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15 Mistakes women make during Sex

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15 Mistakes women make during Sex

Post  Rokurou on 30th July 2008, 8:28 am

15 MISTAKES WOMEN MAKE WHEN HAVING SEX:

1) BEING PASSIVE

Don't let him undress you and himself. Just help him a little bit, like making the first step. It won't hurt. One more thing, just cause we are men it doesn't mean that we must do all the work.


2) WEARING JEANS OR TIGHT PANTS

It takes time to take off these kinds of clothes. Every second counts. Remember one thing: the more time you got, the more rounds you got. And the more rounds you got, the more you are satisfied. Be smart.

3) GOING DOWN HALFWAY

Once you start going down, don't stop at the belly button or around it. Keep going or just don't go below the neck at all.


4) CHOCKING OUR CHICKEN TOO HARD

Men feel pain; we are not as tough as you think. No man has a leather Dick. You got to be smooth with the Dick. Pulling it too hard doesn't make us feel horny it hurts us even though we don't tell you.


5) LICKING OUR EAR TOO MUCH

It's just the same as a dog licking a bitch’s ass.


6) MOANING LIKE A RUNNER WHO NEEDS AIR

Better moan with style girl cause men love to make fun of girls who can't moan like movie stars (Halle Berry, Whitney Houston). Try not to make too much noise when you exhale.


7) SCRATCHING OUR BACK

We don't need no autographs, girls. It does not feel good at all! Depending on the length of the nails, and how deep you dig the nail in our backs, they leave permanent marks. So keep your nails in your pockets, please. If you feel the need to scratch a brother's back, either grip the hell out of the sheets, or the headboard.


Cool LETTING YOUR LONG HAIR FALL ON HIS FACE

Men need air: they breathe. So please be intelligent a little bit. Don't just think about yourself:


9) JUMPING ON OUR HIPS TOO HARD

A man is not a horse so please take it easy unless you got a big booty that can take care of the landing.


10) SCREAMING TOO LOUD WHEN YOU CUM

What are you, crazy? Do you want us to get caught by parents or you just love to see us jumping trough the window butt naked?


11) KEEP YOURSELF CLEAN

Everyone knows that fish has a smell. But we don't have to be smelling it when you take your panties off. Please warn us if you haven't freshened up. And nobody wants to suck on no salty, dirty titties. Ladies; men aren't the only ones who sweat you know. And we sure don't want you smelling like you work at a fish market either. Make sure your ass is clean! No man wants to eat off a dirty plate.


12) Make sure your feet are in check

Every man has a certain turn on, everything on a woman must be perfect, that's how we like it and love it. Do not, I repeat do not! Get in bed with us with your feet looking like you've been walking barefoot on toxic waste. You know what I'm talking about, nail polish coming off halfway, smelly like hell, Uneven toenails, soles are ashy as hell feeling like sand paper, it's hard to perform good foreplay when you have hammer time, and most and worst of all, don't even think about asking us to suck your toes if they look like they've been beaten with a sledgehammer (ugly). And we are not too fond of unpolished toes either. We like them soft, smooth, pretty and most of all tasty looking.


13) GIVING HEAD

Some women have a very bad habit of using your teeth, this is not a banana. It's a hell of a difference between a Dick and a banana. We understand that you also hate us nudging your head down. Tough shit, live with it. All women hate this, yet for as often as you do blow us, it's worth the aftermath. There is an element of desperation involved here when we do this. For women, it's a very short step from being dragged to a cave by the hair, but a complete turn on for us anyhow.


14) AFTER SEX: BROADCASTING

Don't go bragging to your girlfriends that you so called got us "whipped" or "sprung”. It’s not cool at all, especially when our homies are around.


15) KEEP IT REAL

When you're at the point of a breakup in a relationship, don't wait until then to tell us we didn't knock it right. You know damn well we had you climbing walls & walking on air.
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Re: 15 Mistakes women make during Sex

Post  Admin on 30th July 2008, 8:59 am

I lol'ed IRL...

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Re: 15 Mistakes women make during Sex

Post  Briena on 30th July 2008, 10:33 am

So true.

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Re: 15 Mistakes women make during Sex

Post  Messman on 30th July 2008, 6:22 pm

lol
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